Life and it's many questions

I have found that life is full of hundreds of questions that need to be answered. As a preschool teacher I get asked the question "Why?" almost twenty times a day. Most of the time I can answer the question but then there are those ones that I just can't and it makes me feel like I haven't done my job and these children aren't getting the right education from me. However I do know that not all questions have answers.

I think that sometimes as adults we forget that we too ask the question "Why?" but most of the time its to ourselves and we already know the answers we just don't want to face them. They are either to scary, to maddening, or just not what we are looking for at the time.

I ask myself a lot of times, "Why isn't my relationship good with someone in my family?" But then again I do know the answer but I hate what it is and wish that it was really different because I feel shut out and not wanted. Although it does change sometimes where I feel more welcome and included but I understand why the answer the way it is.

Then there are the questions we all ask and they is "Why did God take them from me?" I have had more death in the last five years of my life then I'd want anyone to ever have. However in the last six months I have lost one of the most important people in my life and one that would have been a the most important person in my life. The same question came up again why. Why me? Why my family? Why her, why the person that loved everyone and made things right with the world? My mom was so wonderful and it breaks my heart everyday to walk through the world without her but that's another blog. The other person was going to be my husband and I's first child our first. We found out right before thanksgiving and the day after Christmas found out that the baby stopped growing at six weeks. Many people will say that it really wasn't anything but until you are pregnant and have had this idea of bring someone into the world you will never that it was someone and it was heartbreaking all over again to lose that someone.

No matter what we all have "Why" questions and I wish that all the answers could be found but we can't at all.